What others think about Me: Honestly initially I used to think a lot but today I don’t care about any such gossip. I rather enjoy to cut short or ignore such conversation than to absorb things that intentionally or intentionally hurts me whether its related to my weight, my parenting style, home management, career management, further planning, etc. I better aim to focus on my present that’s slipping away so fast and there is just one thing that really bothers me; my baby and my big baby- hubby.
If I sang the last song well: Today I can sing from my heart and shake tiny dance steps among the crowd and I don’t feel awkward anymore. I know that I have to keep my baby engaged so even if her happiness comes out with the funny, up-down faces that I make, I don’t care what others have to say about it. A performer in me has silently returned and I enjoy my-time with baby whether at home or outside.
My dressing style: I have always been comfortable in what I wore but being a mother has extended my preferences to the far extremes. Lose pajamas, t-shirts, chappals or a big size t-shirt, I now feel so relaxed to wear those and I can even walk down wearing those in a shopping mall. I want my space and if its an attire, so I want space wearing them too. At home, gowns that were earlier a big no-no are happily repeated. Also I no more shy to wear the same top or a dress if I feel comfortable to hold my baby in it. Afterall in a span of 24 hrs, more than 90% she is with me and I can’t carry a further overload.
Food likes or dislikes: Now this is a serious concern, I have been a selective foody but things has drastically changed. Oppositely today I cook what my baby likes and eat the same as well, who will cook separately again and again!
Breastfeeding in public: Oh, that’s must be taboo still, when people make that strange glare as you open up in public but they forget that the baby doesn’t know what is public or private. Nothing can calm an annoying baby than the warmth of mother’s feed and hence any strange smirk, stare or notion can take a backseat ! When my baby want it; she want it. I no longer care if somebody suggests me to “use a bottle in public”, I do as what I feel is better for the baby.
My daily-chores: I cook food everyday ( 3 times minimum). Laundry, washing, bathing and all the household stuff happen everyday so deciding when, what and how to do it is my headache. And trust me with the baby, household management is not a child’s play. So while I’m doing everything, I don’t have to prove if my house shines better than yours! I do things my way and I don’t care if you think why I get up at 8 AM, its my home!!
My Job: Well I thought a lot about my career or job or future aspirations and then I actually gave up. What I want from my life is happiness and love, and I no more care about disturbing and worrying myself about the career gap. Few things are beyond control and my baby is my priority. My baby has hired me already since her birth so I have no leaves, no free time to think anything except her.
You: It’s my life and life is too short to focus on others but yourself. If I will be happy, then only I can keep my child and family happy. I have realized that times when I’m tensed or sad, that has distracted my focus on baby too and she really shouldn’t suffer because of me. So I don’t bother what is your opinion about me. I have faith in god and on good things of the world. Rest doesn’t matter !
P.S. And if you worry about my growing eyebrows, please turn back. Is it the only important thing you have to do??